With Control Over Other People Comes The Loss Of Intimacy

From slavery to personal power struggles, when there is an imbalance of power, we lose sight of ourselves.

Long ago, someone made an interesting observation about intimacy. He made this observation in a book, one of the first books I ever read about self-discovery:

Intimacy is me being me, and letting you see me.

That book was written by Bob Earll and it’s called, “I Got Tired Of Pretending”. It was all about how we lose sight of ourselves through addiction. Since that time, I’ve carried that observation, being careful to show people who I really am without pretense, and then I’d let the chips fall where they may. I want to be loved, and in order for me to receive that love, I must allow others to see me as I am. If I do not, then I must keep up appearances to be the person that I think other people want me to be.

So when I’m with others, I let them know, politely, what I’m thinking and feeling. I let them know that I’m behaving as I would want to be. I let them know that I value their time and that I value their part in my life. Along the way, I’ve also learned that efforts to control other people tend to limit opportunities for intimacy.

I’m reading an interesting history book, too: “…And Forgive Them Their Debts”, by Michael Hudson. Hudson is an economist and historian, and he’s plumbing the scrolls and tablets to see how economics grew…