One of the things that I learned as a parent and a husband is this: just because you’re angry doesn’t mean I have to be angry, too. I can make a choice to be angry. This is something that I’m teaching my kids and my wife.
Blocking is like giving someone the silent treatment. It’s punishment and near as I can tell, punishment doesn’t teach any interpersonal skills. Well, punishment does teach obedience and rebellion. What you actually get depends on the person, the day, and which way the wind is blowing.
Punishment is like declaring war, too. And once you punish someone, then you have to deal with them. I always use diplomacy first, with big dose of reason. Usually, that sorts things out.
So I don’t block people. I let them say what they need to say, and I respond, kindly, not in kind. After that, I’ve said what I needed to say and let them be.
Thank you for your article. You’ve confirmed something I’ve been thinking about for a long time now.